NEVER BEEN A LOVED ONE

by Ramamurthy, Sivaranjini

  “We are safe,” Sara said, smiling with her bright eyes of hope.

  “Have you gone crazy? Just look at it.”

  “Ha look at it, look it’s a pregnant woman.” CK kept scanning the idol to make sure what she said was true.

  “So that’s why they fell on your legs,” he said with a big smile.

  “I think so too,” she shrugged.

  “We are finally in a safe place, I just can’t believe this is happening.” CK held her hand tight and looked deep in her wet eyes, smiling.

  “You can’t imagine how much I was afraid of my delivery, and I was not even able to share my feelings with you being scared that you may fear more than me,” Sara’s eyes turned red.

  “I do know that baby,” CK held her arm. “But only this baby has saved our life now,” he said, keeping his hand in her stomach.

  “Exactly, I was crying for days about why I became pregnant and how I could lose my control but only now I realized it was meant to happen. Every instance in our life has its own value but only we don’t have the patience to wait and see it,” Sara said, cupping her stomach.

  The tribes turned towards them, being aware that they are not following them. Sara and CK got a glimpse of them and started to walk. They were carried away by the beautifully organized place under one big tree. They inhaled the air of hope. They were taken to the hut in the middle of the place surrounded by all other huts. By the look of the tribal who came out of the hut, it was enough for them to understand that he is the head tribe. After some discussion between the tribe, Sara and CK were taken to the hut. The tribe head gestured something and left them alone.

  “So, they also have a guest house,” said CK smiling. They both burst out in one big laughter without any burden after so many days.

  Sara stopped laughing seeing something. CK turned to look at what caught her attention. He saw a young girl well-dressed taken out of their place.

  “Oh my god!”

  “What?” CK screamed, puzzled.

  “See they are taking her in the direction we came,” said Sara, pointing at them.

  “Yeah, so?” CK asked, looking at them.

  “Only now I get it. We were staying in a love hut.” Sara tapped her feet, pulling CK’s arm.

  “Love hut?” asked CK, looking at her face filled with excitement.

  “Yes, I have read about it. Love hut is the hut built far from the residential area of the tribe. And every girl who reaches puberty in their community are sent to the hut. And men who wish to marry her can go and stay with her for some days one by one. And she can choose the one who she wishes to marry,” said Sara, with her hands sweeping in the air.

  “Is it like the traditional living together?” He asked, with his eyes thinking deeply.

  “Maybe it would have started only from here,” Sara said, shrugging.

  “How do you know all this Sarapedia?” CK asked, smiling.

  “Sarapedia?”

  “Yeah, like Wikipedia,” he joked. They both burst out in laughter.

  THE PRINCESS

  “Only when we become parents we get too know how hard our parents would have struggled to give birth and to raise us,” Sara stated, looking at her stomach and running her hands on it. CK nodded yes, thinking deeply about his own mom, who lost her life for him.

  “My mom used to tease my dad saying, ‘My child is going to kid you for being so lean.’ He used to laugh like anything,” Sara said, smiling, and tears welled up in her eyes. CK patted her shoulder. “I miss him,” she said, tears rolling down her cheeks. CK wrapped her in his arms. “I wish he would have at least seen you and my child, he would have felt so content and happy. Why do people die?” Sara cried, spinning and burying her face in his chest.

  “It’s natural baby, you can’t do anything. There are somethings in this world that are beyond our control. We have to accept it or else in the process of controlling it, we will lose ourselves.” CK brushed her hair and hugged her tight, thinking about the loss of his mom. “Okay, comeon. You are strong. Your dad wouldn’t want you to cry, does he?” CK asked, cupping her face. Sara nodded no, weeping. “Try to accept it. Learn to live and cherish the memories. You at least have memories. I don’t even have one with my mom. In that way you are lucky when you are feeling low, just think about the people who are less gifted than you,” CK wiped her tears. “Oh my god, being with you I too started to philosophy. Okay, enough of tears. Tell me about your memories, I want to know about my father-in-law,” CK shook her shoulder.

  Sara smiled saying, “Like every father and daughter relationship, ours too was special. He did whatever he could and even whatever he couldn’t. My mom used to say that he only washed my diapers as she become weak after my delivery. We had a special bond from my birth, which didn’t exist with him and my brother. And my mom used to say that at the age of one, I used to jump like anything seeing my father riding the bicycle back to my home from office. And I used to cry in my kindergarten that I’ll only go with him in the cycle to my school. They made me study in a reputed school beyond their status. He would ride me among the cars driving to my school,” Sara narrated with a painful smile.

  “He never made me to do any household work. Even when my mom was not feeling well, he only did it. One day when he was making dosa for us, I went to make one. I tried but I couldn’t,” Sara laughed. “He plucked the ladle from my hand and asked me to leave. I started to use the kitchen only after he left me. Now I make crispy dosas but he is not there to eat them every time I cook something delicious. I’ll always have that guilt that I have not made him even a single dish.” She fought back her tears. “And whenever I am at home, I used to wake up only by hearing his voice. My mom would get tired of waking me, but my dad would keep on calling me “Ammu, ammu” to drink coffee. I didn’t know the values of those days at that time.” Sara closed her eyes, holding her forehead. CK was imagining each incident as she spoke. She brushed her fingers through her face, tucking back her hair behind her ears.

  “I can never forget the taste of the tea which he made when my mom went to a function. He had never made tea even for my mom. Sometimes even my mom would feel jealous about his love towards me,” Sara smiled, looking deep into the forest. “He would always support me in the arguments between me and my mom. My mom would plead for a thing for years but if I ask the same thing, he would buy it at least by borrowing.” Her eyes grew red.

  “He is from a rural village. He studied so hard to earn this job. He used to say that he would sleep next to the hostel warden in school and college so that they would wake him up in the morning to study. He always felt the pride seeing my grades since I studied just like him. We have more things in common —had.” Tears welled up in her eyes. He doesn’t know the gift culture, but he surprised me one time with a gift that too gift-wrapped along with chocolates. That’s my best birthday present till date. I have not gifted him anything. I was so determined to gift him only using my first salary. But when I got it, he was no longer there,” she fought back her tears. “I won’t say we have never fought, we did, but we always knew that we loved each other. I was like a princess in his own castle.” She continued sobbing.

  “Now you are a queen in our own castle,” CK said, hugging her tight and kissing her forehead, which brought a smile on her face.

  THE TWIST

  The tribe head guided CK and Sara to a place. They were shocked seeing an officer sitting on a rock. He closed his eyes, refreshed and saw him again to make sure what he saw was true. He realized it was a forest officer. He bent down and touched the foot of the head for saving their life and showing them the path. Head said something, but as usual, he didn’t understand so he just smiled. Sara couldn’t come out of the shock, she didn’t close her mouth. The officer was smiling, seeing their excitement. CK shook her shoulder and only then she blinked her eyes and smiled. She hugged CK.

  “We are going home, home! I can’t believe it!” Sara was about to jump in enthusiasm, forgetting she is pr
egnant. Seeing it, the officer rushed to stop her. He nodded his head and said, “Don’t jump,” in a different English slang.

  “Thank god he knows English,” said CK, jumping and raising up his hand on behalf of her.

  “I was informed about you earlier by the head, but it took me some time to get permission from the government for your return,” said the officer with a sad face.

  “It’s okay we are so glad that you have made it. Sell it and book the flight ticket,” said CK giving the gold bracelet.

  “Okay, I’ll book tickets for tomorrow. Be ready, I’ll drop you at the airport,” said the officer, getting the bracelet. The tribe who threw the bracelet was puzzled seeing it. He made signs asking whether the chain could take them home. CK nodded yes.

  “Then why didn’t you leave earlier, using this bracelet?” The tribe signed. CK didn’t know how to explain to him so he just smiled as usual. As soon as the officer left, the head announced something to the tribe and they all shouted in chorus. Then suddenly a tribal girl pulled Sara to a place.

  CK was dressed up just like them. The tribal girl asked Sara to remove her dress and Sara nodded no. So, the tribal girl bent to apologize. Sara felt like a queen and raised her up. She was decorated with sea shells on top of her saree. Then she was brought out. She saw CK dressed up like the tribe king waiting near the camp fire. Sara was mesmerized seeing his look wondering how he looks hot in any costume. Meanwhile, CK was scanning her inch by inch from her forehead. When he reached her neck, he saw her neck twitching, hearing some loud beat. The head of the tribe came out with the loud sound. He said something to the whole crowd who were more dressed up than usual and they shouted and jumped in happiness, seeing them, CK also jumped. Only after noticing Sara’s smile, CK realized what he did. He kept his palm on his face, smiling and thinking, This costume makes me feel like I am one of them. In another beat, everybody assembled in pair forming a circle. Sara was made to stand next to CK. He noticed the head and his wife also standing next to him. Sara realized their makeup is distinct from others.

  “Oh my god, this party is for us!” Sara shouted near CK’s ears above the beat sound.

  “Oh really?” CK asked, astonished.

  “Yeah, see, our makeup is more special than theirs!” Sara was excited. Only then CK looked all around them. He then flinched, hearing a loud beat. Hearing it, everybody started to dance.

  Sara and CK were laughing without knowing what to do. The head tribe insisted them to dance, signing them. They joined them, following their steps. It was simple, graceful and it was repeating so they started to dance, synchronizing with them within few minutes. They were enjoying their night near the campfire wearing seashells in between the tribes in the middle of forest. In the flow of dance, the girls formed the inner circle and the boys the outer circle. While dancing, CK thought, Why did the world develop? If we all were tribes, we would have enjoyed with nature more than we enjoy now with gadgets. There won’t be any urge for money, there won’t be any urge for popularity and life would have been simple with more love. Here each mother treats every child as theirs. He didn’t want to leave from there. But the next second, he changed his idea when his love held his hand when the circle merged. He wanted to give her the best comfort of the world. He felt content after seeing Sara’s eyes enlightened with confidence for their life. He felt happy seeing her happy. He realized that real happiness lies in seeing your loved ones happy.

  After a while, the beat stopped. Two tribal brought soup in mud-bowl and gave it to Sara and CK. CK got it and gave it to the head, but he compelled him to have it. CK and Sara bent down their head, showing respect in their way. As soon as they had a sip, the whole crowd shouted. CK and Sara were wondering what was going on, then everybody had theirs. Sara was so delighted by the way they celebrated their last day with them.

  “They are pure in their heart. They celebrated us without expecting anything in return,” she said, sipping the soup.

  “They live in the present. They never save or think about the future unlike us. That’s the reason.” CK looked at the tribe enjoying their day. Suddenly Sara held CK’s hand, with her other hand on her stomach.

  “Baby what happened? Is it paining?” CK panicked.

  “I can feel some movement like a butterfly flapping,” said Sara, excited, enlarging her bright eye.

  “I think our baby is also enjoying the moment,” CK kept his hand on her stomach.

  “So, we have more stories for our baby,” said Sara, smiling so did CK. Then they had a good feast after a very long time. They had different varieties, which they have never tasted or even seen. They ended their dinner having fresh honey, which they felt was the yummiest of all. Then Sara and CK went to their hut as everybody dispersed. Sara lay on the cot so tired.

  “I will never forget this day,” said CK, sitting near her leg.

  “How could we? I felt like a queen among them,” said Sara.

  “You are always my queen,” He massaged her leg.

  “You will forget me after you get your princess,” she tried to tease him.

  “Even if I get 1000 princesses, you are my only queen,” he assured her, holding her feet.

  “Oh my god, 1000?” Sara laughed. CK lay next to her and they slept within a few minutes. How couldn’t one sleep when their stomach and heart is full?

  CK woke up squeezing his eyes, feeling the sunrise. He saw Sara who was still asleep. He blocked the sunrise falling on her. To wake up next to a loved one is an awesome feeling, thought CK, looking at his sleeping beauty. After a while, we will be in our world and she will be in my bedside forever ’ he thought, rising up from the cot with full energy. He got ready and came to the hut, she was still sleeping. He slowly patted her shoulder as she wrinkled her forehead and again slept. He patted a little harder and she then opened her eyes and was about to sit suddenly. He stopped her and she relaxed and smiled looking at him.

  “Did I scare you baby?” CK asked.

  “No, I thought I was late,” Sara was puzzled.

  “You go get ready. We still have time. He has not arrived yet,” he replied caringly.

  “I can’t believe it. Is it a dream or are we really going home?” Sara asked, excited, widening her eyes.

  CK kissed her forehead, hugged her tight and said, “Can you feel the heartbeat? Its real.”

  She smiled. CK kissed her cheek and asked her to get ready soon. Those kisses gave her the energy of the day. She got ready soon being excited about going home. She wore her salwar kameez and she was more beautiful than usual.

  CK was admiring her one last time in the middle of the forest. Sara raised up her eyebrows with a smile on her lips. Seeing it, CK came to consciousness. He came quickly and grabbed her cheeks without moving his eyes from her.

  “You are more beautiful than usual,” He whispered.

  “Maybe the confidence that I am going to be with you forever added to my beauty,” she replied, holding his neck. CK moved his hand to her waist holding her closer.

  “I told you I’ll never let you go,” he uttered, feeling her breath.

  “I love you,” Sara looked deep into his eyes. Those words stunned him. He recalled it repeatedly, looking into her eyes. Sara looked down blushing, realizing she said it. He lifted her chin and smiled seeing her blush.

  “No lips have uttered those words to me,” his eyes moistened, as he rubbed his finger through her soft lips.

  They heard someone’s footsteps so they stepped back suddenly and acted casual. They understood that the man has come with the tickets from the tribal’s action. They nodded their heads and the tribal turned and was about to leave. CK wanted to cherish the moment she proposed, so he was waiting eagerly for the tribal to leave. As soon as he left, he grabbed her waist and came back to the previous position swiftly.

  “I am all yours. You have the rest of your life to spend with me, but they are waiting for us now,” Sara smiled and removed his hand. Like a child, he refused to come. She grabb
ed his wrist and pulled him out of the hut. They reached the head’s hut. She left his hand and adjusted her shawl and went inside. They saw the head and the officer with the tickets in his hand. The officer stretched his hand giving the ticket with a smile. Seeing the tickets, their eyes widened and were filled with happiness. CK held her hand and got the tickets from him saying, “Thank you,” “so much,” added Sara.

  “It’s ok, I’ll take you to the airport in my jeep,” said the officer. They got blessings from the head. They heard some noise as they got up from his foot. They looked at each other puzzled and then they turned towards the head tribe. Seeing them, the head tribe peeped out of the hut. He saw a big crowd of the tribe waiting for their send off. The head held their hands and brought them out of the hut. CK and Sara were stunned by seeing the unexpected sendoff crowd. Most of them had fruits in their hands as a sendoff gift and some women gifted their tears by hugging Sara. Seeing it CK went speechless thinking, Mankind was so pure at heart, but we have poisoned it in the name of development. He came out of his thought when he saw the closed palm of the head stretched before him. CK looked at the head and he slowly opened his palm. He saw a beautiful sea-shell made chain, which he had seen on a newborn tribe baby’s neck. He got it by bending his neck and touched his foot again to get his blessing. The head blessed him and raised him up by saying some words.

  The head raised up his hand and the whole crowd became silent. The head walked forward holding CK’s hand and Sara followed them. As he walked, the people paved way. CK and Sara felt the royalty. They didn’t want to leave the place, but they also knew that they can’t stay there forever. They reached the jeep. CK moved aside for Sara to get inside the jeep. He helped her and soon the fruits were kept inside the jeep. He tried to explain to them that these can’t be taken in the flight, but they didn’t hear him. He looked at the officer and Sara smiled at him. He stopped explaining and breathed a huge sigh of relief, seeing their unconditional love. He did their crazy move and it made them happier, and they joined him. The jeep engine started and he jumped inside the jeep. The jeep slowly moved. CK and Sara waved their hand saying bye. To their surprise, they also waved back after watching them for a minute. CK and Sara were in awe seeing it.