Shattered Chaos (Steel Roses Book 1)

by Samantha Bee

  He throws pointed looks at the other two, but Ryder just smirks while Kade huffs, “Like you aren’t just as bad.”

  “How long have you guys had her niece?” I ask. There are a lot of toys here. I can’t imagine it being a totally new situation.

  “About six weeks, I guess,” answers Ryder. Wow, okay that’s a bit longer than I had anticipated but also explains the sheer amount of stuff laying around. I realize that’s around the time that I saw them all at the club. I recall the wound on her arm that they had seemed cagey about as well as the state of Ryder’s face and how gingerly he moved.

  “Does it have anything to do with the injury to her arm?” I ask. I’m not totally surprised when the three of them trade looks again. They probably didn’t expect me to make the connection, I probably wouldn’t have except, I’ve already been aware that Scar has secrets. Once you know, it’s easier to pick up all the little hints and clues that you may otherwise have overlooked. It helps that my brain has always been highly analytical, and I can see patterns and connections everywhere. It’s one of the things that makes me so successful in my field.

  Ryder just gesticulates like it doesn’t really matter but at this point, his answer is irrelevant. The looks they all traded was answer enough for me. “Like I said, we don’t have all the details,” he shrugs.

  “Details about what?” a voice sounds from behind me. I turn around already smiling at just the sound of her voice. Her long black hair is piled up on her head, but her makeup is perfectly done. I can tell she was in the middle of getting ready when she probably heard our voices and came to investigate. She’s still in her sleep clothes, only wearing a long black shirt. She has a little girl sitting on her hip that pulls the material up high enough that we all get a view of her blue boy short panties.

  I grin as I run my eyes down her long legs. Damn, she is a sight for sore eyes. It has been a long as fuck six weeks and I’ve missed her. It’s the longest I’ve gone without seeing her.

  “Noah,” she says surprised but with a huge smile spreading across her face, “I didn’t know you were here yet.” She throws an exasperated look at the guys but all three of their eyes are still glued to her long, lean legs. Fuck, I’m having a hard time myself not focusing on them.

  I grin, “Hi, baby girl.” I move towards her slowly, the little girl has an assessing glare as I move. It seems far too mature for a girl of her age, so I move carefully, not wanting to startle her. I reach them and rest one hand on her hip opposite of where the little girl sits. I lean down to kiss her forehead and whisper in her ear, “I missed you.”

  That would normally be too much for her, but we’ve grown closer over the last several weeks. Almost enough for me to hope that there just may be a chance of more than what I had initially thought possible. I know she won't give up the other guys and I find myself okay with it. We talked through text and over the phone almost every day since the last time I saw her and the way she talks about them, I just know they fit her.

  We’ve talked more in the last couple months than we had in all the months prior to that first interaction with Kade. Things have been slowly changing between us and I don’t even think she realizes it, but I know she feels more for me now as she leans into my kiss and her expression softens just a bit. I see the emotion that flashes in her eyes that tells me she missed me too.

  I let her off the hook by changing the topic, “And who is this little princess here?” I take a good look at the little girl. She has long, light blonde hair. Not ashy or golden but somewhere in the middle, like a warm champagne color, naturally darker at the top before it lightens. She examines me with huge blue-green eyes that don’t miss a thing.

  Something shifts inside my chest that I don’t wholly understand as I meet her heavy gaze. It’s much too serious for a child. “Noah,” Scar says, her voice just slightly breathy, “this is Rowan.” I smile at the little girl who hasn’t taken her eyes off of me since they entered the room. “Roe baby, this is the friend I’ve told you about, Noah.”

  My smile grows knowing that Scar has been talking to her about me. An unfamiliar warmth rushes through my chest watching Scar with her. She is so much softer with Rowan, softer than I’ve ever seen her. She looks like a mom and it satisfies something deep and primal in me.

  “Okay, I have to finish getting ready,” Scar says, throwing me an apologetic look.

  “Don’t rush, we have time. You can wear workout clothes though,” I let her know. She runs her eyes up and down my body taking in my own attire. I dressed in loose basketball shorts and a shirt. Seemed like the best idea for what I have planned.

  Kade walks over to take Rowan out of Scar’s arms and I notice she tightens her arms around her neck, not wanting to let go. Scar sighs as she drops down, placing Rowan on her own two feet but staying on her level, “Sweet girl, we’ve talked about this.” Rowan doesn’t say anything, choosing instead to shake her head as she clings to Scar tighter.

  I tilt my head as I study the worry lines that have appeared in the corner of Scar’s eyes as she looks down at the little girl and the tears starting to form in her eyes. Ryder walks up next to me and explains in a low voice, “She still doesn’t like to be separated from Scar.”

  Luca sighs from behind me, “We’ve been working on it. Scar has barely left the house in weeks.” I look between the worry that flashes in all of their expressions. If Scar has barely left the place, then the little girl probably hasn’t either. That can’t be good for a child her age. She needs sunshine and to run around.

  Before thinking about it too much I just offer, “Why doesn’t she come with us?” They both probably need to get out and I don’t want either of them to be stressed and missing each other.

  “Noah, you asked me on a date,” Scar says, as if I don’t remember why I’m here.

  I roll my eyes and scoff, “And now I’m asking Rowan on a date too.” I wink and grin at the little girl, noticing that she’s loosened her hold on Scar and some of the panic has eased from her features. “What do you think, little princess? Want to come on a date with me and Scar?”

  A little grin spreads across her face and I don’t miss the dumbfounded look that crosses Kade’s face. Scar looks shocked at the sudden change in the little girl. I push it just a little farther, “What I have planned will be perfect for you,” I say speaking directly to Rowan, “sunshine, games,” I drop my voice down to a whisper, “treats.” As I talk, her smile continues to grow.

  “Noah, are you sure?” I can hear the hesitation in her voice, but the hope and relief are there too. She wants me to say yes.

  “Of course, it’ll be fun. I promise.”

  Scar nods as she agrees, “Okay then,” and places a sweet kiss on her head. Rowan releases her hold on Scar and hesitates briefly before flinging herself at my legs. She quickly wraps her arms around me in a quick hug before she lets go and takes off down the hallway. I can’t help the excitement bubbling up through me.

  Multiple gasps sound throughout the room and I catch Scar’s bewilderment before she takes off after the little girl.

  Luca is in my face before my smile even has a chance to fade. “How the fuck did you do that?” he demands.

  Confusion swirls through me, “Do what?”

  Kade and Ryder both cough but I noticed they’ve both moved closer and are staring at me quizzically. “Roe doesn’t touch other people,” Kade starts to explain.

  I look between the three of them and see a multitude of emotions in all of their gazes, apprehension, curiosity, jealousy, but even a little bit of hope. “It’s taken us weeks to work up to her being comfortable enough to hug us or let us hold her.”

  “How the fuck did you do it?” Luca demands again.

  The utter seriousness in his tone makes me huff out half a laugh, “I promised her treats?” It’s half an answer, half a question. I already know better than to ask why Roe doesn’t like to touch people, why she seems so comfortable with Scar but not the men. I know they probably w
on’t tell me and even if they did, I probably wouldn’t like their answer very much. “It just seemed like if she’d been cooped up in here like you said, taking her out to play in the sun would do her good.”

  Ryder slaps Kade and groans, “Why didn’t we think of that?”

  Luca defends, “We take her to the gym to play with the boys.”

  I raise a brow, “So she’s been here and to the gym?” He nods emphatically. “Nowhere else?” I clarify. They all nod. “Have any of you even been around kids?” I ask exasperated. What kid wants to stay locked inside all the time for weeks on end?

  “Honestly,” Ryder sighs, “none of us really have. We have no idea what we are doing.”

  The three of them all look sheepish at the admission but Kade cracks his neck, “To be fair, she does get overstimulated easily. Just keep an eye on here and take it easy,” he sighs. The worry evident in his tone and posture.

  “Why don’t you just come with us?” I offer. Yeah, I’ve missed Scar, but I gave up any semblance of alone time we would have by inviting Rowan and I can’t bring myself to regret that. I can steal some alone time with her later. Until then, I bet the girls would love for everyone to come.

  Ryder groans, already sending a pleading look towards Luca, “You aren’t going to let me out of work, are you?”

  Before he even has a chance to respond, Scar walks back into the room, “You aren’t skipping training,” she snaps, sending a scathing look at Ryder.

  “Fuck,” he moans, defeated as he sulks out of the room. He stops and presses a kiss to Rowan’s head, and I notice how she holds perfectly still as he does it. “Have fun, sweet girl,” he murmurs, and she smiles and gives him a little wave. I can see what they mean about her being hesitant with touch.

  Luca doesn’t acknowledge my offer more than a brief nod before he follows out the same way Ryder did and also stops to say goodbye to the girl. I have a feeling he’s about as eager as Ryder to continue with work today but didn’t want to give Scar the chance to put him in his place too.

  Kade on the other hand is rocking back and forth on his feet like an eager puppy, “Can I come, Scar?” he asks like an excited child. It’s quite funny because she reprimands him with just a look that makes her seem like his mother.

  Scar has matured since I last saw her. A part of me is disappointed I wasn’t here to witness her transformation into this softer, more rounded person. Her interests no longer just reside in having a good time, she has a more serious and compassionate edge to her now. Mostly, I’m just thrilled to see it and get to experience what I could only get a taste of though our video calls.

  She sighs but I cut her off before she can turn him down, “I did invite him.” Her eyes flash to me. “Why?” she gasps, obviously surprised. I mean why wouldn’t she be?

  I shrug but Kade is the one to respond first, “Ouch,” he feigns chest pain as he lifts his hand to press against it.

  She ignores him as she studies me, “I thought you missed me?” she questions. I move towards her and pull her flush against me with my hands resting on her hips. I bend down and nuzzle into her hair until I can whisper in her ear, “Of course I missed you, baby girl.” I press harder against her so she can feel just how much I’ve missed her. I smirk at the shiver that runs through her, “I plan to steal you away later to show you just how much,” I finish the promise with a quick nip to her ear lobe.

  Tension eases out of her posture as she leans into me. I wrap my arms around her and take a deep breath, inhaling her sweet familiar scent. She hugs me tightly and the anxiety I’ve been ignoring evaporates from my chest. Scar isn’t the type of girl to wait for someone and when I realized I would have to be away for so long, I worried I’d come back to find she didn’t care about me anymore. I’m relieved that isn’t the case. I know she won’t be mine forever but I’m not ready to let her go yet.

  Still wrapped tightly around me, she peaks her head to the side “Okay, you can come.” Kade whoops behind me as Scar relaxes her grip only to move her arms higher as she climbs me like a tree. Her legs go around my waist and her arms around my neck as she presses her face into my shoulder. I smile as I turn to meet Kade’s smirking face as we both look down at Scar. I wouldn’t normally think this about her but she’s being sorta adorable. Never thought I would say that about the brazen woman I first met.

  “Come on, butterfly,” Kade opens his arms and lifts up Rowan. “I’ll drive,” he calls over his shoulder as we carry the girls out of the house.

  The car ride was on the longer side, but it flew by as Scar caught me up on everything she felt like I had missed in the last few weeks. Kade added his own stories and they both told me more about Rowan, although not what had happened to her. It seems they had a lot more issues with her than just her being overstimulated easily. Whatever that little girl has been through, she hasn’t had an easy road and her health suffered for it. It sounds like she gave them all quite the scare these last few weeks. The whole car ride she stayed silent, observing us, giving some smiles and nods before passing out.

  Probably for the best she gets some rest before we get to where we are going. I didn’t tell either of them where we are headed yet, though they’ll probably figure it out soon.

  Just as I think about it, I hear Scar behind me, “The pier?” I note the almost childish curiosity in her tone and am confident she’s going to love what I signed us up for. It only took a quick couple of texts to make sure we could add Rowan and Kade to our session, but the guy assured me it was no issue.

  “I have something planned for us at the pier,” I admit but refuse to disclose any more details even as she pushes me for more. Rowan wakes up to Scar begging for just a hint as Kade parks in the lot.

  My cheeks are starting to hurt from how much I’ve been smiling since I got to Luca’s house, being around Scar and even Kade has lifted my entire mood.

  Rowan quickly catches up to our excitement as she grabs Scar’s hand and chooses to walk. She tentatively reaches out to grab my hand with her free hand, I give her a huge smile as I take her tiny hand in my own. Kade ruffles her hair as he teases, “I see how it is, Butterfly. He promised you treats and now he’s your favorite.”

  She beams but nods and we all chuckle at her honesty. The affection between Kade and her is obvious so I know he’s not put out that she chose to hold my hand. On the contrary he seems a bit glad as he assesses the familiarity, she’s already showing me.

  I lean over as I point down the pier to where all the carnival games are, “After we have an adventure,” I tell Rowan, “we can go down there and play games and get treats. Sound good?” She excitedly nods and I wonder again why she doesn’t speak. Is she just extremely shy? Or is it more? Kade and Scar don’t seem to be surprised or perturbed by her lack of vocalization.

  I let it go as I lead them to the other end of the pier where a huge area is set up. Scar jerks to a stop as she stammers, “You didn’t.”

  Her eyes are locked on the area I’m leading them towards. It’s an outdoor aerial school where you can sign up for single lessons for a chance to learn some quick and exhilarating tricks. I signed us up for a little bit of everything offered at the beginner’s level, the trapeze, the silks, and the hoop.

  I don’t know who is giddier at this point, Rowan or Scar. They both have stars in their eyes and are bouncing where they stand as Jack walks over to us and shakes my hand, “Noah, right?”

  I nod and introduce the other three. Even Kade has flickers of excitement dancing in his eyes. It was a good call to bring him and Rowan. Jack runs through all of the forms and safety protocols as he explains what our next few hours are going to look like. Scar squeals in excitement as they strap us into safety harnesses and tell us we are all clear.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  I could kiss Noah, or blow him, really.

  This date was the perfect idea and exactly what I needed to get my mind off all the darkness that has been closing in around us lately. The more information an
d evidence I dig up on Romano, the worse my nightmares have been getting.

  I still haven’t found anything leading as far back as my father or his associates and the stress is starting to get to me. No one has seen or heard from Ciar or his second in command either. Romano is breathing down Luca’s neck for answers that we can’t give him. Even he doesn’t know where the fuck his son disappeared too.

  Roe is still not speaking, although she is adjusting remarkably well otherwise. Despite some of her burns and cuts becoming infected, she’s had no other issues. The infections were scary, she got so sick and started to lose the weight she had been steadily gaining back. Thankfully, it seems everything has gone back to normal and healed after some strong antibiotics.

  I know it will be time for her to move in with Joe and Charlene soon. We’ve held back on going full force with the intel I’ve gotten so far, instead focusing on her. We don’t want to start a war while she is still living with us. I’m ready to move forward with revenge but at the same time, not ready for her to move out.

  It’s fair to say, there are more than enough things to stress about and I was in desperate need of a fun filled day like Noah has planned. Having Kade and especially Roe here is just icing on the cake.

  I climb up and grab the trapeze with my one hand as they had taught us first thing when we got up here. The initial moves they teach you are pretty easy and straightforward. Jump off the ledge, holding the bar with both hands, swing, legs up, hook around the bar, release your hands, arch your back, and stretch your arms out.

  It was surprising how natural it was for all of us. My history with dance made it no surprise to anyone how quickly I took to it, but Kade and Noah were doing great as well. The real surprise was Roe though. She figured out all the moves on her very first try and perfected them long before either of the guys did. She was practically glowing.

  The only issue was she still didn’t like strangers touching her and the last move they were teaching us on the trapeze was for someone to grab your hands as you swing and transfer you to the other bar. You’re supposed to do the move with an instructor but of course Roe didn’t want anyone grabbing her, but I could tell she did want to try it.