The Man I Thought I Loved (Two-Faced Book 2)

by E. L. Todd

  Defeat started to creep into his face. “Then it was really rough…”

  “You have no idea.” I walked past him. “I’ll work on it.”

  He followed after me. “So…is she okay?”

  I turned back around. “What do you expect, Charlie? The woman is still in love with you, and I had to tell her you had a thing for my sister and my sister has a thing for you. She hoped you would get back together at some point. She thought you still had a chance. So yeah, she’s fucking devastated.”

  It seemed like he genuinely cared about her pain, the way his eyes dropped and he quietly sighed. “Jesus…”

  “Yeah. Jesus,” I snapped. “Ugh, I wish my sister had never moved here. I wish none of this was happening. I wish I didn’t have to break my best friend’s heart again when you already broke it.”

  He raised his hand. “I get that you’re upset, but stop yelling at me.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest and forced myself to calm. “I just… This really sucks.”

  “I know it does.” He walked back toward me, his eyes sympathetic. “I appreciate you doing this, helping me like this.” His hands went to my arms, and he gave me a gentle squeeze. “I don’t want to hurt Kat. I’ll always love her…in a way. I wish she were head over heels for Nathan and I was the last thing on her mind. But I can’t put my life on hold forever. I’ve waited as long as I can. This is complicated and painful, but it had to happen.”

  I nodded. “She did say it’s given her the closure she needs. Now that she knows it’s never going to happen.”

  “Then maybe some good will come out of this.”

  “But she also said she couldn’t handle seeing the two of you together, if that ever happens. We all hang out together all the time, so it would always be in her face…and it would be too hard.”

  He rubbed his hands up and down my arms. “Yeah, I get it.”

  “But I’ll give her some time to process what I said—”

  “Maybe I should talk to her now.”

  “What?” I whispered. “I think that will just make it worse. You’re going to try to convince her to be okay with your infatuation with my sister? No. That’s not going to work, Charlie. Just give me some more time.”

  He dropped his hands. “Alright.” His eyes remained on my face, looking at my features, particularly my lips.

  “What?”

  His eyes narrowed. “Your lips look all weird.”

  My fingers brushed across the bottom lip, feeling the slight puffiness. “Dax and I…kissed for a bit on his couch.”

  “A bit?” He grinned. “That had to be at least an hour’s worth of kissing…hard kissing.”

  “Well, he’s a good kisser.” I dropped my fingers.

  “So…you guys do the deed?”

  “No. Just kissed.”

  His eyebrow rose. “You guys made out on the couch, hard, for an hour and didn’t sleep together?”

  “Taking it slow. I’ve done the fuck-a-thon thing already. I want it to be different this time.”

  His smile remained, but his eyes softened. “That makes me really happy.” His arms circled my waist, and he brought me close, his chin moving to my head, his arms feeling like home. “You’re back…”

  Seventeen

  Dax

  I sat at my desk and grabbed my phone. With a smile on my face, I texted Carson. Can I take you to dinner tonight? I’d avoided asking her on a date because that seemed like too much, too fast. But it felt right now…after our passionate interlude on my couch. That happened days ago, but I hadn’t stopped thinking about it.

  Hadn’t stopped smiling.

  She texted back. Yes.

  I read that response three times.

  Another message popped up. But I have one condition.

  Name it.

  Nowhere fancy. I want a hot dog or something.

  My grin widened. Got it. Nothing fancy. But a hot dog? Really?

  Are you telling me you don’t hit up the food carts on the street?

  If I did, would I look like this? Not really.

  Fine. No hot dogs. But something at that level.

  How about that Chinese place we went to last time?

  Peeeeerfect.

  I chuckled. See you then, sweetheart. I set my phone to the side.

  It vibrated again. By the way, I got flowers today.

  Well, they weren’t from me. Yeah?

  Your sister sent them.

  Good. Finally mending the relationship she destroyed.

  Said she was sorry about our last meeting. But that was totally unnecessary. She’s free to dislike me all she wants. I don’t care.

  I liked her no-bullshit attitude. She was confident and unbreakable. I told her we’ve reconciled, so now she has no reason to dislike you.

  Then they are even more unnecessary. But they’re beautiful and they’re a nice accent to my desk, so tell her I said thank you.

  I will. I set the phone down.

  Minutes later, Renee walked inside. “Your ex-wife is a real peach.”

  Nothing could sabotage my mood, not even Rose. “Yeah?”

  “She’s here, you know, causing destruction.”

  “Lovely…”

  She tossed some papers onto the desk.

  I kept my stare on her face.

  With one hand on her hip, she stared at me. “You look creepy when you smile like that.”

  “Creepy? I have a nice smile.”

  “But when it’s constant, it’s just weird. Why are you smiling anyway?”

  I wasn’t going to tell her about the session on the couch, the way we collided passionately like we were making love. Her nails anchored into my back and left marks that were still there. She bruised my lips with her aggressive embraces. Her hands were all over me, in my hair, on my shoulders, scratching down my chest. She writhed underneath me without even needing my dick. I was more than enough. “She just told me about the flowers you sent.”

  “Oh, good. I’m glad she liked them.”

  “Yeah.”

  “So, did that fix it?”

  “She didn’t have any ill feelings toward you, so I guess there was nothing to fix.”

  “Then, my job is done?” she asked.

  “Not quite. What if the four of us go to dinner?”

  “Really?” She cocked her head to the side.

  It was a little soon to do a family dinner, but since Carson had already met Renee and William, I didn’t see the harm. “She already likes William, so that shouldn’t be a problem. And I know you would like her if you got to know her.”

  “The smile you’ve been wearing for days already makes me like her, Dax.”

  Good answer.

  “She just needed to pull her head out of her ass. It’s okay, we’ve all been there. Just let me know where and when.”

  “Got it.”

  She turned to leave. “And get those papers signed by the end of the day.”

  Charlie opened the door. “Hey, man.”

  I walked inside and greeted him with a grip of our hands.

  “What brings you here?”

  “Taking Carson out.”

  “Oh, like a date?” He shut the door then faced me.

  “Yeah.”

  He smiled. “Good. Just don’t take her anywhere nice. She hates pretentious food.”

  “Yeah, I figured that out,” I said with a chuckle. “We’re going to a Chinese place.”

  “Perfect.” He gave me a thumbs-up. “Maybe have another make-out session afterward.”

  “She told you that?”

  “Man, she tells me everything, and I mean everything.”

  “Good to know,” I said with another chuckle.

  “She seems pretty happy. Has nothing but good things to say.”

  “Yeah. I’m really happy too.”

  He glanced toward the hallway to make sure she wasn’t there. “She told me she wants to wait because she wants it to be different with you.”

  I knew
I was getting a version of Carson I’d never met before, someone without walls, someone without fear. She was giving me her heart, piece by piece. She didn’t want me because I was hot or had a big dick. She wanted me on a much deeper level, just like it’d been on the couch. “It already is different.” Based on that kiss, she was ready. Ready to give all of herself to me, to make love to me. But I’d let her realize that on her own.

  He gave me a clap on my shoulder. “You want a beer?”

  “No. I’m sure she’ll be—”

  “God, I’m hungry.” She came down the hallway in jeans and a blouse, her long hair in curls, her makeup dark and sultry. She looked like fire, dancing flames. She grabbed her purse from the table and walked up to me, her eyes light with affection, like she couldn’t wait to reach me.

  My arms circled her waist, and I gave her a kiss. My hands snaked down and gave both of her cheeks a manly squeeze.

  “You enjoy your dinner.” Charlie walked away. “I’m just going to go throw up.”

  As if she didn’t hear a word he said, she pulled away and looked into my face with a pretty smile. “Ready?”

  “Yeah.”

  We left the apartment and headed to the sidewalk.

  I grabbed her hand and locked our fingers together.

  She turned to me, a slight smile on her lips.

  This was what I wanted, what I’d wanted since the moment I set eyes on her. I didn’t miss the strippers or the strangers in the bars. I wanted this, even though I’d thought I wasn’t ready to have this ever again. But she didn’t care about my money. She didn’t want to go to a fancy restaurant and watch me drop a thousand dollars on a single meal. She didn’t even ask me about that sort of thing.

  It was exactly what I wanted.

  We reached the Chinese restaurant and took a seat at a small table, the same one we had last time, right up against the window.

  “If we’re going to get hot and heavy again, I’ll skip the spicy stuff.”

  She looked at her menu, a smile moving onto her lips. “Good thinking. I’ll get the chicken lo mein.”

  “Me too.”

  The waitress came over, and we ordered drinks and our food at the same time.

  “When am I going to see that article?” My elbows were on the table with my hands together, and she did the same thing, leaning forward like she was trying to get to me, and I was trying to get to her.

  “I’m done with it.”

  “Yeah?”

  She nodded. “You want to read it first before I publish it?”

  “I trust you’ll make me look good.”

  She chuckled. “Vince had me rewrite a couple things because he said there was an obvious bias to it…”

  “What kind of bias?”

  “That I think you’re sexy and charming.”

  “Well, I am those things, so that’s fair.”

  She laughed. “Now I need to go back and add arrogant.”

  “Also true, so also fair.”

  “It’ll probably run on Friday. I’ll let you know.”

  “I’ll grab a copy so you can sign it.”

  “I’m not a novelist,” she said with a chuckle.

  “You’re still a writer. I’ll frame it and put it on the wall.”

  She didn’t say anything, but her eyes gave away her feelings. My support of her career clearly meant a lot to her. It was her passion, not just her job, and compliments were a big deal.

  I hated the danger her job put her in, but I didn’t know what the solution was. If I asked her to stop, she would never agree. And if I asked…she would probably dump me. She didn’t seem like a woman who would want to be with a man who would ask her such a thing. So I just had to keep my mouth shut…and pray nothing ever happened to her.

  “What’s new with you at the office?”

  I shrugged. “Meetings…and meetings.”

  “Come on, that can’t be true. Based on what you told me, you’re pretty involved in product development.”

  “Which is done through meetings…”

  She chuckled.

  “That is the part of my job I enjoy the most. I enjoy steering the guys in development. If I had the skills or the intelligence, I’d probably move down there and actually work alongside them.”

  “You definitely have the intelligence. Maybe you just need to acquire the skills. Have your sister take your position, and you move downstairs.”

  “Always an idea.”

  The food arrived, and Carson immediately dug in. She must have noticed my stare because she offered an explanation. “I didn’t have lunch today. I was running all over the place, and Charlie didn’t have any food when I came back.”

  “How are things with Charlie?”

  “He was disappointed by Kat’s response but also sympathetic to the situation. I’ve been giving Kat some space…”

  “Probably a good idea.”

  She stabbed her fork into the noodles, spun them around, and then placed everything into her mouth in a big bite.

  “I was thinking we could have dinner with my sister and William this Friday.”

  She slowly chewed her food, her eyes on me. When she got everything down, she still took a bit to respond. “Is there a reason why?”

  “I just thought it would be nice if you and my sister started over.”

  She took another bite.

  I hoped this wasn’t pushing her too much, but I’d been optimistic about a more positive response. “If you aren’t ready for that—”

  “No,” she said. “Let’s do it.”

  Her response was a relief. “You already know William and you’ve met Renee, so I didn’t think it would be a serious thing.”

  “It’s fine. It’ll be fun.”

  I really loved this new version of her, a woman who wasn’t ready to run the second any kind of commitment was put on the table. She was giving her entire effort this time, wanted us to be together for the long haul. “Renee told me she likes you.”

  “What?” She stopped before placing another bite into her mouth. “How can that be? You should have seen the way she ripped into me, which is fine. She was just protecting her brother. If some girl were hurting Charlie, I’d probably go full Cersei on her too.”

  “Because I’ve been really happy, and she knows that’s because of you.”

  She continued to eat, but there was a softness to her eyes, an affectionate haze to her features that showed how much that meant to her. “I’ve been really happy too…and that’s because of you.”

  I walked her back to her apartment, but I hoped the night wouldn’t end on the doorstep.

  She got the door unlocked and opened it, but Charlie was sitting on the couch, so she closed it again to say goodbye.

  I didn’t want to walk away and sleep alone. I wanted to feel her back against my chest, listen to her breathe as I fell asleep. I wanted her hair all over the place, even in my face, her smell heavy in my nose.

  “Thanks for dinner.” Her hands moved to my stomach before slowly gliding up.

  “Thanks for letting me pay for it.”

  The corner of her mouth rose in a smile. “I get to pay next time.”

  “Alright.” I knew she would never change, that she didn’t want me to pay for everything every time we went out. That just wasn’t who she was, and while I didn’t want her to spend her money on me, I wanted to respect her wishes, even though it was hard sometimes.

  “Well…goodnight.” She was in her flats, so she had to rise on her tiptoes and grip my shoulders to kiss me.

  I pulled her into me and balanced her as I kissed her, giving her a goodbye kiss instead of a heated embrace. But her lips were so soft and full…and she was such a good kisser. She knew how to give and take, let me have her all I wanted before she reciprocated.

  She moved away and lowered her feet to the floor.

  It was impossible to leave her. “Can I stay over?” The words came out of my mouth easily, of their own accord. I didn’t want anything phy
sical from her, just to feel her soul wrap around mine like it had on the couch.

  Her eyes shifted back and forth as she looked into mine.

  “Just to sleep.” My hand moved into her hair, keeping it back from her face.

  She gave a slight nod. “Okay…” She turned back to the door and walked inside.

  We moved past the living room and headed for the hallway.

  Charlie ignored us, watching TV with a beer in hand.

  We entered her bedroom.

  My eyes immediately went to the headboard, where I’d secured her wrists and took her hard. Bondage wasn’t particularly my thing, but when she asked me to do it, it was the hottest thing in the world.

  My dick got hard at the memory.

  But I pushed the thought away because that wasn’t what I wanted to do now.

  Her fingers went to the bottom of my shirt and slowly pulled it over my head.

  I let her undress me, felt the cotton move over my head and tug on my hair. My heart started to race a little because it was hot, watching her remove my shirt.

  Instead of dropping it to the floor, she held it in her hands. “Do you mind if I wear this?”

  And then she made it even hotter. “No.”

  She moved toward the door. “I’m going to brush my teeth and wash my face. I’ll be back.”

  “Alright.” I watched her go until the door was closed behind her. I wasn’t sleeping in jeans, so I took them off and left my phone on her other nightstand so it would be within my reach. I changed my alarm to go off a little earlier than usual, so I had time to head back to my penthouse and get ready for the day.

  I pulled back her covers and lay there, looking through the blinds of the closed window.

  She returned minutes later, her face free of makeup, her hair having a kink in it because it’d been in a ponytail in the bathroom. My shirt was almost to her knees, practically a potato sack on her, but she looked sexier in that than she did in the black lingerie.

  With one hand behind my head, I stared at her, watched her walk into the room, gorgeous in makeup and just as gorgeous without it. She turned off the lamp then got into bed beside me.

  Once she was under the covers, I turned to face her, pulling her leg over my hip, bringing us close together, her chest to mine, our heads on the same pillow. It was so comfortable, like we fit together perfectly despite our height differences. My hand slid underneath the shirt and up her bare back, finding the ideal place to rest against her spine.