The Bull Rider's Fresh Start

by Heidi McCahan

  “Okay, baby girl. Hang on.” He gave her a gentle push, staying in front of her the whole time. The breeze lifted a curl on the top of her head and she kicked her legs, obviously thrilled with her first outdoor swinging experience. She looked so adorable in her white shorts and baby-size pink T-shirt. He’d grab the hat as soon as he took a picture.

  Pulling his phone from the back pocket of his jeans, he quickly snapped a photo. He shielded the screen from the sun, checked to make sure the picture was in focus, then snapped a few more and texted them to his parents. They didn’t have any pictures of Adeline yet. He was trying to do better about sharing any that he captured.

  “Are you sure she’s buckled?” Kelsey’s impatient tone jumped on his last nerve. “What happened to her hat?”

  Landon tucked his phone away. “You slathered about a gallon of sunscreen on her. I’m sure she’s fine.”

  “Not on her head. She has to wear her hat.”

  Oh boy. He stopped the swing, retrieved the hat and put it back on Adeline’s head.

  She shrieked and tried to push the hat off.

  Great. Just great. Father of the year right here. “I know you hate it, but your mom says we have to.”

  “You don’t need to make me the bad person. Do you want your baby to have a sunburn?”

  “No, of course not.” Did she think he was a monster? Adeline cried louder, kicking both legs in anger, and shoved the hat off her head.

  “See? This is a perfect example of why I can’t trust you. How could I possibly agree to you keeping Adeline while I’m thousands of miles away when you can’t even keep a hat on her head to protect her from the sun?”

  Ouch. He pushed his hands through his hair and turned away, forcing himself to take a few long strides and count to five before he answered. Her harsh words pierced him. The last thing he wanted to do was fire back with hurtful words he’d regret later.

  “We’re leaving.”

  Landon turned around, but Kelsey didn’t wait for him to respond. Her fingers trembled as she unbuckled the swing then lifted Adeline into her arms. She strode across the small park, snatched her diaper bag off the ground, then slung it over her shoulder. When she tried to lean down and yank the blanket from the ground, she wobbled off balance, and Landon jogged to catch up.

  She recovered, draped the blanket over her arm and strode toward the car. Adeline’s pitiful crying filled the air. He jogged faster toward Kelsey’s retreating backside. He couldn’t let her go without at least defending himself.

  He reached her car before she did and opened the back door. “No matter what you think of me, I’m still her father. I’ve never done this before, so I’m figuring things out as I go along. When I make a mistake, I try again. It’s not a big deal.”

  She froze beside the open car door, Adeline wedged on her hip. “Not a big deal? This is a child. An innocent, helpless baby. You can’t afford to make stupid mistakes, because then she’ll get hurt.”

  “I would never hurt her on purpose.” Landon fought to keep his voice even. “And no matter how hard you try, you’re going to mess up sometimes, too.”

  “Not if I can help it.”

  Kelsey shoved the blanket onto the floorboard and tossed the diaper bag on top.

  Man, for a girl who said she didn’t want to argue, Kelsey sure knew how to land a powerful punch with her words. While she leaned into the car and put Adeline in her car seat, Landon stood back, his mind racing. Sweat trickled down his back, making his T-shirt stick to his skin. Spots peppered his vision. The temptation to retaliate with pointed words of his own was getting harder and harder to resist.

  Kelsey straightened, then closed the door and faced him. “I’m not backing down. I can’t go back to Hawaii not knowing whether she’s safe.”

  “Can I ask you a question? Do you honestly think Wade and Maggie did everything perfectly? They didn’t have children yet, so how do you know they didn’t make mistakes while they were responsible for Adeline?”

  She glared at him, her fists shoved on her hips. A tense silence filled the space between them. “I didn’t have to worry because Wade and Maggie weren’t addicted to pills.”

  Anger burned white-hot. He opened his mouth, then clamped it shut.

  She turned away, circled around the front of the car and climbed in without looking at him or even bothering to say goodbye.

  He leaned down, grabbed a stone from the pavement at his feet and hurled it across the playground. Then he found three more and threw those, too. The rocks clinked against the metal frame of the play structure then fell to the ground.

  Infuriating, that’s what she was. When would she stop flinging his mistakes in his face? Worse, was she always going to use them as a reason to keep him away from Adeline? He hated that it had come to this. Maybe he’d have to hire an attorney after all, because she’d made her intentions clear. She wasn’t going to let him keep Adeline.

  * * *

  “August tenth?” Kelsey reined in the irritation creeping into her voice. “That’s two weeks from now. Why can’t we have the memorial service sooner?”

  Her mother sighed into the phone. “Maggie’s mom had back surgery a month ago, and she’s had some setbacks with her rehab. Now that she’s lost her daughter, you can only imagine what a tough time she’s having, and your father’s still recovering from his episode.”

  “His episode? Is that the stroke you forgot to tell me about?” Kelsey sandwiched the phone to her ear while she collected the toys strewn across the living room floor. “I can’t believe I had to find out about that from Landon.”

  “I didn’t want to upset you. You have an important job to do.”

  “I also have a right to know what’s going on at home.” Kelsey squeezed the plastic rattle in her hand until her fingernails dug into her palms, then forced herself to take a deep breath. The news that Maggie and Wade’s memorial service had been postponed made her want to fling the toy against the wall. “My stepfather had a stroke and you handed my daughter over to a total stranger. Those are two key facts you should’ve shared with me immediately.”

  “Landon Chambers is Wade’s best friend. I’d hardly call him a stranger. We’ve had a rough month, honey. What with Wade and Maggie passing so suddenly and—”

  “All the more reason for you to keep me informed, Mom.”

  “I was worried about sharing too much bad news all at once. You’re alone and so far away, with nobody to lean on for support.”

  Oh, here we go. The if-only-you-had-a-man speech. “Please don’t.”

  “Don’t what?”

  “Make me feel guilty for being an independent woman with a career.”

  “I am not making you feel guilty.” Her mother’s voice wobbled. “Your job is important. And so is your daughter. Adeline needs stability.”

  Oh brother. Kelsey massaged her forehead with her fingertips. Had Landon asked her to deliver this lecture? It sounded awfully familiar.

  “I’m worried you won’t be able to provide that for her,” her mother continued.

  Kelsey regretted making this phone call more and more with each passing second. No matter what they discussed, her mother always found a way to remind Kelsey that she should find a husband. That somehow her life was lacking because she didn’t have that special someone. They’d been on this conversational merry-go-round countless times. Frankly, it was exhausting.

  “Landon is so nice and so concerned about Adeline.”

  “He’s also an addict.”

  “Everyone makes mistakes,” her mother said quietly. “Adeline deserves to have her mother and her father in her life.”

  “Landon and I are not together,” Kelsey said. “So please don’t get your hopes up, because that’s never going to happen.”

  Again. That’s never going to happen again. She and Landon might be in the same zip code wit
h their daughter, but it was only temporary. Falling in love with him was out of the question.

  “I need to go.”

  Kelsey winced at her mother’s wounded tone. “Mom—”

  “Thank you for calling. Let me know when you’re coming, and I’ll get the guest room ready for you and Adeline.”

  “Okay, thanks.” Kelsey ended the call and slumped on the sofa, staring at her phone in her hand. “So that went well,” she whispered. Why didn’t her mother accept any responsibility for her mistakes? She hadn’t even apologized for asking Landon to take Adeline without permission.

  Kelsey refused to support the skewed philosophy that a woman needed a man to be happy. That had always been her mother’s approach. After she and Kelsey’s father divorced, her mother hadn’t been single more than a month before she found a new boyfriend. While none of the men who came and went from Kelsey’s life ever harmed her, she had learned quickly not to trust. Not to get attached. Because they’d always leave. Eventually they’d choose something or someone else. Just like her father had.

  Finally, after a long run of casual, failed relationships, her mother met and married Bill. Still, Kelsey never allowed herself to genuinely love him. As soon as she was old enough, she had enlisted and left home.

  And now here she was, almost twelve years later, a single mom with a young daughter in need of a safe, stable home. She’d tried so hard to learn from her parents’ mistakes. Tried so hard to make wise decisions. Tried so hard not to need anyone.

  But her mother had been right about one thing. Adeline deserved to have her mother and her father in her life. And despite her intentions to keep Landon at arm’s length, this news from her mother meant her stay in Merritt’s Crossing was extended another week. Unless she convinced Landon that she and Adeline needed to travel to Wyoming without him.

  Landon is so nice.

  She batted away the words like a baseball player swinging for the fences. A nice guy wasn’t enough. She’d seen plenty of nice guys leave. Or turn not so nice when life got too difficult to handle.

  Except Kelsey couldn’t ignore the nagging thought that her mom had been right about Landon. He was nice. Kind and thoughtful, too. That smile might possibly be her undoing. Along with the scruffy five o’clock shadow hugging his jaw like it was its job.

  Ugh. Stop. He was also a drug addict.

  Kelsey slid her phone onto Laramie’s rustic, distressed wooden coffee table, then stood and padded toward the kitchen. She paused, studying the closed bedroom door down the hall. Without a baby monitor, she had to rely on listening for Adeline to cry out when she woke up from her nap. So far, only the hum of the refrigerator nearby filled the air.

  Kelsey checked the time on the microwave. Four fifteen. Adeline was sleeping longer than she had yesterday, but that was probably normal.

  Wasn’t it? She gnawed on her thumbnail, unsettled by the weighty responsibility of making decisions about her daughter all by herself.

  It doesn’t have to be this way, the quiet voice inside gently prodded her. Landon is more than happy to help. You just have to ask.

  Wow, her mother had really gotten inside her head. Kelsey whirled away from the counter. She wasn’t about to wake a sleeping baby. Everybody knew that was a bad idea.

  Restless and bothered by her mother’s words still flitting through her head, Kelsey opened the refrigerator and removed the casserole she’d defrosted for dinner. It was too much food for one person.

  Maybe she could share a few bites of the casserole with Adeline if it didn’t have too much garlic and onion. While she waited for the oven to preheat, she remembered a bag of precut broccoli someone had brought her and she pulled it from the fridge, too. This was so strange, living in someone else’s house and using random pots and pans Landon’s friends and family had donated. The kindness and generosity made her uncomfortable if she thought about it too much, so she focused on filling a pan with water to steam the broccoli.

  The rumble of an approaching vehicle outside caught her attention. She glanced out the window above the kitchen sink. Landon. She recognized his white truck, along with the familiar way her heart kicked against her chest wall, like a horse eager to bolt from its stable and run free.

  Settle down.

  His truck churned up dust as he pulled into the gravel driveway.

  He parked and climbed out of the cab. Her eyes homed in on his long denim-clad legs and lace-up brown work boots hitting the ground. Then he reached back into the truck and pulled out a plastic shopping bag. As he closed the door, a lock of his sandy-blond hair spilled over his forehead. He wore a navy blue T-shirt that rippled in the breeze as he walked toward the porch.

  She couldn’t look away. Her eyes followed him until cool water overflowed the edge of the pot then splashed in the stainless-steel sink.

  Uh-oh. Good thing he hadn’t caught her staring. She turned off the water, drained the excess from the pot, then set it on top of the stove. This is not a big deal. He’s allowed to stop by and see his daughter. There’s no need to get all worked up.

  Her silent pep talk did nothing to calm her internal turmoil. Landon knocked softly at the front door, and she hesitated. She’d have to tell him about the new date for Maggie and Wade’s memorial service—if her mother hadn’t already let him know. He’d probably be thrilled to hear that she had a reason to spend another week in Merritt’s Crossing.

  She was the opposite of thrilled.

  Drawing a wobbly breath, she crossed the room and opened the front door. Landon grinned and held up the plastic bag. “I brought you something.”

  * * *

  His breath caught as her fingertips brushed across his knuckles.

  “Thanks.” Her gaze bounced away from his. He tried not to stare at her long lashes resting against her creamy cheek. Or her bare legs peeking out from the hem of her long sundress.

  After their contentious meeting at the park yesterday, he’d planned on stopping by long enough to deliver the new baby monitor and hopefully spend a few minutes with Adeline.

  Except he wasn’t prepared for the magnetic pull drawing him toward Kelsey, making him wish she’d invite him in. Maybe even let him stay for dinner?

  “What’s this?” She pulled the cardboard box from the bag and examined it.

  “It’s a baby monitor. I thought you might need one.”

  She clutched the box in both hands then flipped it over and looked at the back. Her mouth tipped up in a hesitant smile. “This is perfect. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” Her bright expression grabbed ahold of him, and he felt like his legs were full of helium. When she turned that radiant smile his way, he almost believed he could fly.

  Her smile quickly slid off her face. “How much do I owe you?”

  “You don’t owe me anything, Kels. I’m just trying to help. Make your life easier.”

  Her brows scrunched together. Probably measuring his response and trying to decipher any ulterior motives.

  He patiently tucked his hands in the back pockets of his jeans, refusing to let her suspicion get to him.

  Kelsey clutched the box to her chest. “Adeline’s still asleep, but she’ll probably wake up soon. Did you want to come in and say hi?”

  Well, how about that. Maybe a spontaneous gift was the key to chipping away at the walls she’d constructed. He tried to mask his excitement. “Sure, I can hang for a few minutes.”

  Or an hour. Or three. She didn’t need to know that all that waited for him at home was a frozen pizza and a professional baseball game on TV.

  She stepped back and he went inside, then quietly closed the door behind him. As he followed her toward the kitchen, he couldn’t help but admire how the lime-green cotton fabric of her dress emphasized her trim, athletic frame. He let his gaze rest on her long braid, intricately woven into a fishtail pattern he didn’t see very oft
en. Her hair was the color of burnished copper and spilled across her shoulder.

  Maybe he should come back another time. A time when his hands weren’t itching to play with the end of that braid, or twine one of those loose strands of hair that framed her face around his finger.

  What in the world? Dude, get a grip.

  Gage had recommended showing up and keeping his word...not pulling her into his arms and kissing her senseless.

  Heat crawled up his neck as he paused in the doorway, determined to keep a safe distance.

  “Would you like something to drink? Water or iced tea? I think there’s some lemonade, too.”

  Landon stared in disbelief as she moved around the kitchen. Why was she being so kind? So hospitable? Where was the feisty, fiercely independent Kelsey determined to keep him at arm’s length no matter what?

  “Water’s fine. Thank you.”

  She set the monitor and shopping bag on the counter then filled a plastic cup with ice and added water. “Here you go.” She handed it to him. This time he didn’t let his fingers touch hers.

  He took a sip of the water and stared at her over the rim of the cup.

  She fired a curious look over her shoulder. “What?”

  He leaned against the door frame, secretly enjoying that his presence couldn’t be ignored. “Are you all right?”

  “I’m fine. Why?”

  “You’re being really nice to me. It’s unexpected, that’s all.”

  Especially after yesterday.

  She sliced through the packing tape with her fingernail, then opened the box. “You brought me something useful. The least I can do is offer you a glass of water.”

  “I see. So this hospitality is going to be short-lived, is that what you’re saying?”

  He caught the twitch of her lips as she turned away and tried to hide her smile. “You’re not funny.”

  “I’m not? How about charming?”