The Morning After the Wedding Before

by Laura Ziepe

  At that moment, everything was perfect.

  Chapter 37

  Six Months Later

  Holly

  Holly still couldn’t believe that Lottie was now at primary school. As she waved goodbye and watched her run happily through the school gate, she felt a wave of sadness: where had her little baby gone? Jacob was sound asleep in his pushchair. It was so strange now, being just the two of them, but Lottie was loving her big school and she was thriving, so Holly was thankful for that. As Holly walked a little further along the road, she was shocked to see Callum in front of her with his daughter. She felt light-headed suddenly, nervous yet tingly with excitement. Eva was wearing the same uniform as Lottie; she’d had no idea their children attended the same school. She’d never seen him there before, but felt delighted it might mean she would be seeing him around more.

  ‘Long time no see,’ Callum grinned widely as they came face to face.

  He looked taller than Holly remembered, clearly over six foot and as handsome as ever with a sharp jaw, angular cheekbones and muscular strong arms on show in his gym clothes. Somehow his smooth, flawless skin was still tanned, making his striking green eyes stand out as much as ever.

  ‘Wait there a sec, I’ll just drop Eva at the gates.’

  Holly watched him kiss and cuddle his little girl before she walked off and her heart melted a little. A few moments later, Callum walked briskly back to Holly’s side.

  ‘I didn’t realize Eva was at Lottie’s school; she’s really enjoying it there.’

  ‘It’s a really good school,’ Callum told her. ‘It’s scary when you have to first let them go, but Eva loves it.’

  ‘How have you been?’ Holly asked, pleased to see him. ‘I haven’t seen you since Vegas.’

  ‘Good. Not much new to report really. What about you? Ah, he’s gorgeous,’ he said, peering at Jacob lying in the pushchair. ‘How old is he now?’

  ‘Nearly two now,’ Holly smiled proudly. ‘He’s actually quite an easy baby now. Turned a corner. I’m sure this will all change when he hits the terrible twos though,’ she giggled affectionately.

  ‘Probably,’ Callum smiled at her. ‘How have you been?’

  ‘Really good thanks,’ Holly replied, noticing again how striking his green eyes were. She still felt just as attracted to him as she had in Vegas. Callum had a kindness about him that Max had lacked and she would forever curse herself for not going for Callum instead. Why had Holly been blinded by Max’s cockiness and arrogance? She simply didn’t understand how she could’ve messed up so badly and gone for the wrong friend.

  ‘How’s your friend Kim?’ Callum asked. ‘I’ve haven’t seen Emma in a while either – how is she doing?’

  ‘They’re both doing well; I’m going for brunch with them now, funnily enough,’ Holly told him, assuming he hadn’t seen Emma because she didn’t go to the same gym as Charlie any more, which Callum owned. Far too awkward in case she bumped into him.

  ‘I’ve opened another gym in London,’ Callum told her. ‘I work there now instead of the other one where Charlie and Max are. I haven’t seen them in a while either. We’ve kind of lost touch. Charlie has moved to Australia now.’

  ‘Oh really, Australia?’ Holly said in surprise. ‘I’m walking up here,’ she pointed down the road. ‘Are you going this way?’

  ‘Yeah, same,’ he said.

  They walked along chatting as though they’d known each other for years. Callum was so easy to get along with and it felt good to be in his company. He always seemed upbeat and positive. Someone who brought out the best in people and the type of person you wanted to be around. She couldn’t help but feel disappointed when she reached her car.

  ‘This was the closest I could get to school today,’ she laughed.

  ‘I know,’ Callum nodded, ‘it’s always so busy round these roads in the morning.’

  ‘Here, let me help with that,’ Callum suggested kindly, putting the pushchair down for her as Holly carefully carried a sleeping Jacob into his car seat. Holly opened the boot and Callum put it inside for her.

  ‘Thanks, you didn’t have to do that,’ Holly said gratefully.

  ‘Don’t be silly,’ Callum said, glancing at his watch. ‘I’d better be on my way. Can’t be late today as a new trainer is starting and I need to show her round. My offices are in London, which is why I have to dash as I need to make the train.’

  ‘But the train station is the other way?’ Holly said, perplexed. She thought he’d said he was going in the same direction? He’d obviously just said that because he wanted to walk with her. She felt a burst of unexpected excitement. ‘Yeah, it is,’ he replied distractedly, looking down the road. ‘Listen, Holly, do you fancy meeting up sometime? Going for a coffee or a drink or something?’

  He looked unsure of himself, and Holly realized she found this attractive about him. Unlike Max, Callum didn’t know how handsome he was. He didn’t even know that Holly liked him.

  ‘I’d really like that,’ Holly said shyly. She felt really good about going out with Callum, as though she was in safe hands.

  Maybe they would just remain friends, but who knew? Maybe it would be more than that; Holly was eager to see what the future held. She had a very good feeling about it.

  Callum smiled broadly. ‘Great. I guess I’d better take your number then?’

  Thirty minutes later, Holly was sitting in a café with Kim as they waited for Emma.

  ‘Oh my goodness, really?’ Kim gaped at her in amazement. ‘You and Callum actually make a great couple; I think it’s great you’ve agreed to a date,’ she said encouragingly.

  Holly smiled warmly at her friend. ‘You’re getting a bit carried away here, don’t you think? It’s just a coffee or a drink. It may not even lead anywhere.’

  Kim eyed her suspiciously. ‘I have a feeling it’s going to be more than that. Call me psychic or something, I don’t know. But I think this could be start of something for you.’

  Holly could only smile; she had that feeling also and she had no idea why.

  ‘We’ll see. How are you and Andy doing?’ she asked Kim.

  Since Vegas, Kim and Andy’s relationship had taken a positive direction and they’d recently had an offer accepted on a new house. Opening up to each other had actually made their relationship stronger than ever, and they had just come back from a weekend in Amsterdam without the children. Holly was so thrilled for her friend. Kim loved Andy with all her heart; it would have been such a huge waste and shame if their marriage had ended.

  Kim’s face burst into a smile. ‘We’ve actually agreed that as soon as we move into the new house, we’re going to try for another baby. I can’t wait,’ she grinned, her face beatific.

  Holly beamed back at her friend. ‘Oh Kim, that’s wonderful news. I’m so pleased for the pair of you.’

  ‘I know. It’s so lovely spending family days out together; the kids just love being with Andy. Sometimes I feel like I’m the odd one out now!’ she laughed, sipping her coffee and looking cheerful and optimistic.

  Holly gaze swept over to the entrance and she smiled broadly at Emma, who was walking through the door.

  Holly and Emma stood up to kiss her hello.

  ‘God, it’s cold out there,’ Emma groaned, removing her jacket.

  She looked so well, as always. Her skin was glowing and healthy (she’d probably been given some free facials and skin products), her hair was shiny and even down to her perfect nails, she was immaculate. There was something else about her though, Holly realized: Emma looked happy.

  After Vegas, Emma had decided to be more honest on her account and she’d even stopped counting calories and going to the gym as much. She still took care of herself of course, but no longer felt the pressure to be perceived as perfect, so she posted unedited selfies with no make-up on and her feed was full of ‘real’ images that people could relate to. As soon as she’d reactivated her account, Emma had posted a heart-felt video telling her followers that her
relationship hadn’t worked out and the wedding hadn’t gone ahead; the amount of support she had received was astounding and her Instagram had gone from strength to strength. People loved her sincerity. Recently, she had even been asked to create a jewellery range with a large online company. Her career was better than it had ever been.

  ‘How’s work going?’ Kim asked her, eyes sparkling. ‘I saw one of the necklaces you posted the other day from your range. It looks stunning, Em. You must be so proud of yourself.’

  ‘I’m really busy, but loving every minute,’ Emma smiled. ‘It sounds strange, but I’m enjoying it a whole lot more now I’m not with Charlie. I feel like I’m finally in control of my own life. Deep down he hated me doing it; he used to roll his eyes every time I asked him to take a shot of me, but I think it was because he was jealous. He made me feel bad about it, as though I was a complete narcissist, obsessed with looking at images of myself.’ She paused and then said brightly, ‘I make sure I don’t post anything at the weekends now. It’s my time off from social media, unless I need post something for a company. Having a break from time to time does me the world of good. It allows me to focus on real life. I’m taking time for myself and doing the things I love too; I’ve started a photography course, which I’ve always wanted to do. I’m starting to focus on loving myself and building my self-esteem and sense of worth, which isn’t always as easy as it sounds.’

  ‘That’s great,’ Holly chimed supportively. ‘I think it’s wise to take some time away too. Everyone else does from their jobs – you should be able to as well. I remember you telling me how you always wanted to do photography too; good for you to take time out to do something you enjoy.’

  ‘I think people love the fact you’re really true and honest on your social media now too. I was reading the positive comments the other day after you posted that funny photo of you with the double chins,’ Kim chuckled.

  ‘That one was hilarious,’ Holly agreed.

  ‘Oh I know the one. I went to take a photo and my camera was on selfie mode. I clicked it by accident and the photo came out so horrendous that I couldn’t help but share it,’ Emma laughed. ‘I guess people prefer to see that I’m an ordinary person. I don’t always look flawless; nobody does. I get spots and cellulite just like the rest of the women in the world.’

  ‘You’re a great role model to young girls,’ Kim commented. ‘I’ve always worried about the effect all these unattainable body images all over social media will do for girls like Lottie and Willow when they get older. If only more people did what you do.’

  The waitress came over and took their orders.

  ‘So,’ Kim said, turning to Emma, ‘dating anyone?’

  ‘No,’ Emma said easily, ‘it’s been really nice just focusing on myself and healing from my relationship. I finally feel like the old me again, you know? It’s been so refreshing only having to worry about myself for a change.’

  Holly hesitated. ‘Have you heard from …?’

  ‘Frankie?’ Emma cut in, as though she was ready for the question. ‘The odd polite text message, but no. Not really,’ she tucked her hair behind her ears, the light fading from her eyes.

  Emma had told them all about the conversations she’d had with him on the flight home. She loved Frankie, and Holly knew her love for him wouldn’t just disappear overnight.

  ‘Probably for the best, eh?’ Holly said, trying to sound positive.

  Emma flashed them a remorseful smile. ‘Yes, I’m sure it is. I heard that Charlie has moved to Australia so at least there’s no chance of us two ever bumping into each other again. It would be so hard seeing him.’

  ‘That’s good,’ Kim agreed. ‘Seems like he’s doing his best to move on.’

  They spent the morning deep in conversation and Holly couldn’t wait to tell Emma about bumping into Callum. Since Vegas, the girls had made more of an effort to meet up. Emma didn’t even mind tagging along when they went to soft play with Jacob and Willow. They’d had a few nights out too, and it had made Holly understand just how important her friendships were to her. Being close to her friends, Holly felt as though she could do anything. They all did.

  Emma’s phone beeped and her mouth popped open as she read a message.

  ‘What’s up? Who is it?’ Kim asked inquisitively, unable to ignore the look of surprise on Emma’s face.

  ‘It’s Frankie,’ Emma said in a brittle voice, looking astounded. ‘He wants to meet.’

  Chapter 38

  Emma

  Emma couldn’t think straight as she waved goodbye to Kim and Holly. Her mind had been elsewhere as soon as she’d received the message from Frankie, and she hadn’t been able to concentrate on anything the girls had said. He wanted to meet her. She hadn’t seen him for six months, and the truth was, she’d missed him terribly. The messages she received from him just weren’t enough. Looking at photos on social media just made her mind go into overdrive. Where had he been? Who had he been with? Was he seeing anyone? She tried not to look at the ones where he had been with Charlie; it was too sad looking at him after everything that had happened. Luckily, as Charlie had moved to Australia, there hadn’t been any of those for months now. The guilt often ate away at her if she thought about him too much, but other than losing Frankie, Emma’s life was actually going pretty well. She felt as if she’d been lost for a while and now she was finally back, ready for a new chapter in her life.

  She couldn’t stop wondering why Frankie wanted to meet her. He was going to her apartment now, so she didn’t even have time to quickly add a bit of make-up or anything, but she knew deep down it didn’t really matter. Frankie didn’t care about things like that.

  She felt shaky, her heart fluttering like the wings of a butterfly as she made her way to the entrance of her building. Frankie was already standing there, all six foot one of him, outside her front door wearing a navy scarf and parka coat. His dark hair had grown a little longer and he had stubble when he was usually clean- shaven. It suited him.

  His whole face lit up, his hazel eyes sparkling as he noticed her and immediately Emma felt her nerves disintegrate. This was Frankie. She didn’t have anything to worry about. They embraced as though they hadn’t seen each other for six years, let alone six months. He looked better than ever.

  ‘Hello stranger,’ Emma smiled widely. ‘This was a nice surprise. Come on in,’ she said, opening her front door. She’d moved out of the house she’d shared with Charlie and hadn’t seen him that day either. Now she was living in her new apartment, enjoying the peace and freedom of being all by herself.

  Frankie looked round as he walked in. ‘Wow, nice place,’ he admired as he looked round. ‘Oh God, look how young you are there,’ he said, pointing to a photo from years back, which was on her bookcase.

  ‘Look how much larger I am, more like!’ Emma let out a small laugh, feeling as though she had to point it out. She was so used to Charlie mentioning it when she’d shown him old photographs; she felt she had to say it.

  Frankie stared at the photograph and shrugged. ‘I always thought it suited you when you were that size.’

  Emma’s brows knitted together. ‘Really? I was like double the size I am now.’

  ‘Yeah,’ Frankie replied in a serious tone. ‘You were just a bit curvier then, that’s all; you look good either way to me.’

  Emma stared at him in disbelief. He honestly didn’t realize how happy his comment made her feel. Charlie had always made it pretty clear that in his eyes, if she gained all her weight back, he would find her unattractive. He had made her believe it too in the end.

  ‘Thanks,’ Emma replied shyly.

  She made him a cup of tea, remembering just how he liked it.. ‘So what made you want to meet up?’ she couldn’t help but ask him straight away. She needed to know why he was there. She wanted to keep it short and sweet, afraid if she spent too long with him all her feelings would come flooding back, only for to walk away again, leaving her bereft and broken-hearted. She had to know wh
at was going on. It had been a little easier to move on with her life without seeing him for the past six months.

  ‘I just wanted to see you, that’s all,’ he shrugged, but she knew there was more to it. She could see it in his eyes.

  Emma sipped her tea, sitting on the armchair opposite him in the lounge. ‘Really? I didn’t think it was a good idea, that’s all. Don’t get me wrong, Frankie, I’m glad you’re here. It’s great seeing you. I’ve …’ she tailed away, dubious as to whether she should say she’d missed him. She’d told him how she’d felt in Vegas, after all. It hadn’t mattered because of Charlie. She wasn’t willing to put all her cards on the table again. It was too painful.

  ‘Things change,’ he said faintly.

  ‘Like what?’ Emma was unsatisfied.

  Frankie hunched his shoulders. ‘I just want you back in my life, that’s all.’

  ‘You said we couldn’t see each other because of Charlie though.’ Emma was puzzled. ‘To be honest, Frankie, I’m not sure it’s a good idea me seeing you. I’m actually doing really well and being around you would only make things confusing for me. My feelings,’ she knew she had to say it, ‘well, they haven’t changed since Vegas, but I’m doing okay. I think not seeing you is helping and to be quite frank, I don’t think I can be friends with you, I’m sorry,’ she shook her head adamantly, ‘it’s just too difficult.’

  He sat there staring at her, as though he wanted to say something but couldn’t.

  ‘Perhaps it’s best you just drink up and leave,’ Emma forced herself to say. ‘I can’t deny it’s been so nice seeing you, and I really don’t mean to come across as rude, but I just fear you’re going to mess my head up,’ she laughed light-heartedly, trying to ease the tension in the room.