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Loneliness Trilogy Bundle (Play With You, Embrace You, Be With You): Chapter 1I am beyond fed up! Our band just finished the last concert in our first tour throughout England. The focus should be on our music - right? Not any individual member, whether vocalist or musician - right? Well, she did it again. Gemma, our other female vocalist, decided that the audience attention should be solely on her. Know what she did? She lifted her top at the end of her song. She went braless tonight, so the audience got the full, erm, "benefit" of their view. Nice going, Gemma. You freakin' little exhibitionist, you.Chapter 2"Oy, lads, look at the applications we've gotten! We're gonna be very busy auditioning potential members to replace She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named," says Tim. I giggle at his little reference.Chapter 3From that time on, I feel a special thrill in my spirit when Marcus shows up at our practice sessions. Regardless of how long practice is, he is there, sitting a short distance away, writing, nodding occasionally and always listening.Chapter 4Now that our band has successfully introduced Laslow to our fans, Nigel, our manager, begins to schedule performances all throughout England. We spend weeks on our tour bus, driving from England proper to far-flung areas like Scotland, Wales, North England, South England and even Ireland. We have sleepers on our bus, so, when Marcus decides to join us, he claims a bed not far from mine. Of course, we can't do anything together on the bus, but just having him nearby is sufficient. He sits to the side of the stage whenever we perform, just as he's done for every practice we've held since Laslow joined the band. On the bus, he sits right behind me, working on his articles. I work on my crochet or I listen to recordings of music we are currently learning. Always, when we aren't listening to our music, crocheting, sleeping or writing, the five of us chat and laugh uproariously. Marcus and I take special pains to keep from spending too much time together or gazing at each other - the lesson of Gemma and the talks that we had with the band's members have made a strong impression on each of us. I am not about to be kicked out of The Lonely Lovers! Under no circumstances will I let that happen. And I don't think Marcus wants to be banned from joining us at practices, concerts or our tours, so we work hard to put forth the facade that we are nothing more than friends. This means that our times together are limited to when we are at home. As the weeks and months move on into summer, more and more of our things find their way into each other's flats. Of course, when group members visit, we have to run madly around and hide what isn't ours so we aren't found out!Chapter 5I keep going over the band's rules. Tim has said it more than once - "Rules are rules."He's also called me the voice of the band.Chapter 6As we hopscotch across the United States, it becomes increasingly difficult for me to hide my feelings. One day, I just can't get out of bed so I can get to our scheduled practice. By now, we're in St. Louis, Missouri. It's a pretty city, but all I see is Marcus' face in front of my eyes as I miss him. Everything reminds me of him. Finally, I'm able to get out of bed two hours late. But only because Tim and Linny are banging on my door and I don't want them irritating other hotel guests.Chapter 7"I've missed you so much!" I tell him.Chapter 8Our flight is uneventful - until we hit turbulence in the North Atlantic. It's late summer, but this part of the world is still buffeted by cold winds. The unpredictable motions of the plane wreak havoc on my tummy. Before long, I am retching into a sick bag. The flight attendant brings a wet washcloth to Marcus for me then fetches hot water and a teabag. I'm sipping carefully on my tea as Marcus goes through my carry-on, looking for the anti-emetic medication. Finding it, he gives it to me with a significant look. I take it, hoping to keep it down. Fortunately, the turbulence smooths out, for now, at least. The medication makes me drowsy and my head slowly slides over until I'm nestled into Marcus's side. I barely feel him taking my e-reader out from under my hand before I fall into deep slumber.Chapter 9At the church, we all gather. I'm in one room with my family and Marcus is in another room with his. Finally, it's time for us to present ourselves to the vicar. Dad walks me down the aisle proudly with a beaming smile on his face.Embrace You - Loneliness Book TwoChapter 10After Gemma McCullough crashed a stolen car through the front of our old studio on High Street, our band, The Lonely Lovers, has been forced to find a suitable place to rebuild and start anew. In the crash we lost nearly everything we had accomplished so far. Fresh off a successful U.S. tour, we were working on our second studio album, and the first one that would be released internationally. The Lonely Lovers were nearly at the top of the world of rock and roll. But Gemma has ruined that. Our second album is but a pile of rubble, along with our instruments and the history that resided in little old High Street Studio. Now Tim, Linny, Laslow, Marcus and I are in the parking lot observing the wreckage and a local estate rag to find a new home for the band.Chapter 11As my pregnancy progresses another month, The Lonely Lovers continue recording tracks for the new album. We have to redo a lot of our work that got lost when Gemma crashed that stolen car into High Street Studio. The setback puts our band on edge because we have to finish recording as soon as possible before I have the baby. I'm supposed to put as little stress on myself and the baby as possible. The album is due to the mixing and mastering department around the time of my baby's birth. At this point, we are scheduled to record the sixteenth and last track, just before the beginning of my seventh month of pregnancy. Our part is nearly done, but I find that as my uterus grows, it's getting more difficult for me to expand my diaphragm fully. This makes singing much harder. I soldier on - I have found ways of dealing with physical difficulties in the past. On difficult days, I remind myself that we are set to release this album at about the time of my little one's first birthday.Chapter 12Finally, it's time for us to be discharged. I am so nervous - will I know when it's time to feed and change her? How will I know what to do? By the time it's time for us to leave, I'm reduced to a bundle of weepy nerves. My nurse, seeing my tears, comes to me and cuddles me for a few seconds.Chapter 13I continue to feel safe moving from my new home to the studio and around town - but I slowly become aware of a niggling feeling of being watched. Marcus and I discuss this and we both realize that we have the same feeling. I nestle into his side, crying. I had so hoped that the stalking had ended!Chapter 14Inside the house, Marcus goes from window to window, peering outside. We don't rest easy until he comes into the baby's room with an expression of relief.Chapter 15I gasp suddenly, waking myself up. As I sit up, Marcus wakes up, too.Chapter 16Now that both Cara's and Melanie's trials have ended, we return to practicing for the concert tour, which is now imminent. Even though both women are still behind bars, Marcus and the boys feel we should keep our security high - especially since the press are still bothering us. They are still upset at us for the stunt we pulled several weeks ago on the big reveal we hinted at. We're still in complete compliance with the gag orders. The press are, as well, but they do keep a very close watch on us. It's highly irritating. Now that it's so cold outside, we don't take the baby outside, but for a few minutes here and there.Chapter 17Marcus runs into the living room after me. We see our baby girl slumped down on the carpet and go to her, shaking her. She's as limp as a rag doll.Chapter 18On Monday, we finally have a practice. However, before practice begins, we sit down to talk about the pending sentencing hearing and how this could affect our band.Be With You - Loneliness Book ThreeChapter 19Now the trials and sentencing have been finished for both Cara Wells and Melanie Stabb, we all meet at Heathrow Airport in London so we can fly off for our first European city on our tour. This tour will last a month, more or less. While it's shorter than our U.S. tour of last year, I am now a mum to a child just over one year of age, and I am going to miss her horribly! Still, mum, dad, Marcus and I have decided that a regular schedule and consistency are the best for Lizzie, so they will take care of her while we are gone. Marcus is going on tour with us, partly to help with watching out for any more stalking issues and partly so he can help out with moving heavy equipment and such. We still feel very spooked and unsettled - my guess is that this feeling will slowly go away over time. I try to wrap my mind around the thought that Cara and Melanie no longer pose any danger to us, but I'm having trouble really believing it.Chapter 20Finally, the gray, cold wet of winter is over! It's May and the temperatures are now warming nicely. We go to my inlaw's home on one Saturday evening. Lizzie runs around playing while we discuss Millie's return to England. Robert Smythe, Millie's husband, is a social worker, apparently. He was able to work in the U.S., so he should be able to find a posting without too much trouble once they come home.Chapter 21Still, this means that we have to go round the elder Hadley's home several times a month. I dress as conservatively as I can and mind my P's and Q's at my inlaw's home. I monitor Lizzie very closely so she is not forced to spend any more time than necessary in her aunt's company. This is not difficult at all - after hearing her aunt and daddy in the middle of a screaming row, she refuses to have anything to do with either Millie or Robert! Because of this, I spend much of my time conversing with Ruby and Andrew.Chapter 22We finish watering outside, then, after we roll up the hosepipe, we stash it in the shed and go inside. I am quiet, wondering how two such wonderful people as Ruby and Andrew could have produced two such different children! Marcus is very loving, accepting and supportive of all those around him. Even when he disagrees with another person's point of view, he's accepting of the person. In stark contrast, Millie is very narrow-minded and places attributes upon someone based upon their occupation. In my case, to her, "singer" means that I am a loose, promiscuous slut. No matter the evidence to the contrary. No matter that I am, and have always, been faithful to Marcus. No matter that he's the only man I've ever slept with. And, no matter that I'm raising our daughter to be a loving and giving person.Chapter 23The topic wears heavily on my mind for the next several days. Marcus and I decide to ask my mum and dad to take care of Lizzie so we can visit Ruby and Andrew - on a night when we are positive that Millie and Robert will not be there. Marcus learns that Millie will be busy with membership activities at her church.Chapter 24Two weeks later at the end of a long day of practice, I announce my pregnancy to the band. Everyone is excited, and they congratulate Marcus and me. Lizzie claps, not understanding the importance of the moment, so Marcus swoops her up into his arms and tells her she is going to be a big sister.Chapter 25The weeks speed by as we prepare for our benefit concert for the homeless of Saint Albans. We select the play list - this will be different from our usual concerts. The mayor's office has been wonderful - helping us with publicity and, overall, helping us to reinforce our good image with the citizens of the city.Chapter 26I am getting excited and nervous at the same time. I love performing in front of a live audience, but at the same time, I am worried about what Millie and her group have in store for us! We arrive at the city green and Marcus drives to the area that has been reserved for the band and the city employees who have set up the stage, lighting and sound system. We walk to the stage and I hear some disturbing noises. Looking around, I spot Millie's group, holding signs and shouting pre-determined phrases. My stomach does a small flip-flop. The signs say, "Stop artist groups from benefiting! Artist groups and musicians are evil!" Individual members shout things such as, "Fight back against drug use! Protect your children!"