Thirteen year-old Hattie Moore doesn't actually know who her dad is – but that's the least of her problems. Trying to embark on a mission to become a TOTAL HOTNESS GODDESS isn't easy when Miss Gorgeous Knickers at school hates her and NO ONE FANCIES HER. Things aren't helped by her family. Her unbelievably annoying older brother is threatening to reveal to the world everything embarrassing that has ever happened to her. She has a mum who just doesn't get her or why she might want to find out about her real dad and a gran who is a TOTAL mental and who may be texting rude jokes to just about EVERYONE in in the world EVER. Including dentists. Hattie's diary of this tumultuous year is an absolutely hilarious account of the ups and downs of teenage life, including a dating bogey phobia, near death from biscotti and a home-made breast-growing machine.